Friday, December 08, 2006

Bowl Rundown: Installment I














The crap fest that is the first week of Bowl season is just around the corner...and we thought we'd help by letting you know who was doing what and where...here are the games that will be played during the first week...also known as the beginning of college basketball conference play...

San Diego Country Credit Union Poinsettia (Dec 19)

The bowl season kicks off with this choice match up in beautiful Sand Diego. The official flower of Christmas, the poinsettia, has its very own bowl game...and the featured teams are: Mountain West runner-up TCU (10-2), a team that would be undefeated if it wasn't for that damned Mormon state of Utah...a stomping at the hands of BYU and a beating administered by Utah..and their opponent: Northern Illinois (7-5) the third place finisher in the MAC-West Division...that is correct we have so many bowls this year that the THIRD place team in a DIVISION of the Mid-American Conference gets to go...N. Illinois features that midget running back everyone was so excited about and pumping in the Heisman race back in September...Garrett Wolfe...we can't name any of the other players in this game...and doubt (unless you are a Horned Frog or a..umm..a...whatever N. Illinois team is called...fan)...

Prediction: TCU gets the win and the potted poinsettia.

Pioneer PurVision Las Vegas (Dec 21)

Sin City! What better spot to send the Cougars of BYU and their fans? Those wild and crazy Mormons are gonna have the time of their lives. And I bet there will be standing room only with all the polygamists at the wedding chapels...BYU (10-2) somehow was able to go undefeated in the Mountain West...a nine team conference in which only 3 teams managed winning records...the Cougs are matched against Oregon (7-5), a team that started the season as contenders for the pack 10 title...but finished with a losing conference record...

Prediction: BYU rolls...all that pent up frustration at not being allowed to partake in any of the Vegas fun boils over on the field...

R&L Carriers New Orleans Bowl (Dec 22)

Is this a cruel joke? The citizens of New Orleans deserve FAR better than this...The Sun Belt Conference runner ups, Troy (7-5) take on the second place team from the Conference USA West, Rice (7-5)...how much longer will the Sun Belt be allowed to masquerade as a conference...two teams finished the year with winning records...TWO...

Prediction: R&L Carriers doesn't sponsor a bowl next year.

Papajohns.com Bowl (Dec 23)

South Florida (8-4) comes in fresh off their upset of West Virginia...the opponent is East Carolina (7-5)...among the teams that beat ECU this year: Navy, UAB, Tulsa, and Rice...impressive...

Prediction: The Bulls (that's S. Florida) stampede the Pirates (that's ECU).

New Mexico (Dec 23)

New Mexico (6-6) vs. San Jose St (8-4)...give the bowl promoters here credit...sure a 6-6 team from the Mountain West deserves to be in a bowl about as much as Lindsay Lohan deserves an Oscar...BUT, having the home state team in the game might sell some tickets...oh, who are we kidding...there are gonna be even less people in the stands than at the Blue-Gray Game...

Prediction: Spurred on by pride, New Mexico pulls it out and proves once and for all: They DO belong in the New Mexico bowl.

Bell Helicopter Armed Forces (Dec 23)

Tulsa (8-4) had a decent record overall, but actually finished third in the Conference USA-West...behind Rice...Utah, rolling in at 7-5, finished third in the Mountain West...so this is a battle of second rate conference 3rd place teams in a bowl sponsored by the armed forces...yup, be all that you can be!

Prediction: A bitter coach Steve Kragthorpe, who was passed over for numerous better job openings the past few weeks, whips his team into a frenzy and Tulsa gets the nod.

Sheraton Hawaii (Dec 24)

Another bowl that invites the home team...Hawaii (10-3)...how come they get to play 13 regular season games, anyway?...versus Arizona St. (7-5)...ASU had a dissappointing season...the kid that Dirk Koetter let his team talk him into starting at QB shit the bed and cost him his job...but on a bright note...the Sun Devils get to spend a week in Hawaii...before the Warriors drop 60 on them...

Prediction: Sunshine, warm breezes...and a lot of TD passes by Colt Brennan...

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